Faith was not enough, reason and curiosity needed help and I found it by abandoning faith. Faith had become a contradiction. It is the articles of faith, doctrine and dogma, that I found this way. To me faith represented a place to stop, an end to the journey and that is the contradiction. My experience of faith was as an alternative to verification with the implication that verification is somehow wrong. Faith of course is not without its merit, confidence, but faith only gave me a sense of confidence. Faith needed confidence but confidence did not need faith. In fact, confidence worked better without faith.
Faith is like a gate, that someone else goes through, and the rest of us are to have faith about what is on the other side. This is the contradiction, the pretense of confidence, instead of verification. Actual confidence does not need verification but you get it anyway. Faith presents itself as verification, in and of itself, and in exchange you get a sense of confidence. I have known people who find true confidence through their faith but when faith is the confidence, the freedom and liberty of true confidence is lost. Those who employed their confidence, who found their way and left their mark, gaining durable notice in the passage of time, did not intend for us to exchange confidence for faith. Their example was that of true confidence, that we might also find it.
I have no use for faith but I get it anyway. When confidence is true, faith comes along for the ride, free of charge.
Michael, The Mystic Tourist ©2012